We are who we Are!

A few years back when I had just gotten to San Francisco, A young Sir says to me a Pup at the time fresh out of a Leather Family  to live in the big city.

"I want you to think about what you want in a Sir and report of back to me. Think about it as long as you need to"

My response was:

Hmmm what I want in a Sir. Well we could talk optimal circumstances, such as tons of money a spare bedroom and me never having to work again lol but I think that only happens in LA and I would probably die from lack of independence.  

In my mind a Sir is someone who is there to support your decisions, weather that's being the first to tell you that you've fucked up or the one to have your back. I need support. It's hard being a 25 year old and I'll take as much friendly guidance as possible.

Secondly, I want play time and sex. I know that's horrible to place on a relationship lol but it was seriously lacking in my last and I wasn't a huge fan of offering sexual freedom while I wasn't getting any. 

I love to explore! Weather that's in travel, in mind, in body, .... I function best when my brain is occupied with freshness. So let's keep it fresh.

A Sir to me must be a somewhat good example, I want someone to look up too not someone I feel equal or better than.

A Sir needs fashion! But I feel you've got that covered! 

To me a Sir/boy moment is not a relationship but a partnership of souls to help make both persons life's better. Always evolving like an amoeba. Intertwined but independent with a good strong core, a good set of values, and never afraid to change or take shape based on what it encounters. 

That's what I want in a Sir, forward, yes. And I'm sure there is a few things that just didn't make it to my mind but that's the lump of it Sir.  

Now three years in the future as I look back after even more failed relationships, less and less satisfaction and so much self doubt I've come to realize that thing that everyone tells us but that as a twenty something you never listen to. Yourself! 

Its always easier to blame someone else or judge someone else but in the long run I'm learning that your choices are yours and your life no matter how much you'd like to run away from it or change it, is yours. While outside forces may change your life in potential way, you are the one that decides to make that potential energy kinetic. 

This past year I've started looking back, looking forward, and looking inside. I think I'm finally ok with just being me. No matter how twisted or fucked up that may have been or will be. The lessons learned are lessons I am so happy to have had wether good or bad, horrible or hilarious. I love to live. don't you?

Where do you come from? who are you? Whats your story? Lets Talk!